The line between play and life.

Today I was thinking that what I really want right now is a friend or two (or a few) who I can have come over, have tea or dinner or something, and just chat and hang about, and have my boy serve us all.

The thing is that this is surprisingly hard to figure out.

For example, said friends need to be comfortable accepting service in what is clearly a D/s way, HOWEVER, I don't want them thinking that the boy is public property and can be bossed around by anyone. I need the friends to respect him more as a waiter than as a submissive, I suppose.

But I do want it to have that D/s flavour, which means they can't be totally vanilla or kinky-but-vanilla-in-friendship-with-me.

So I'm thinking. About all the bits and bobs of this - not just who I could invite to such a thing, but also what little things I need to organize before I could do it anyway, like training the boy in certain ways and buying a few bits and pieces that I don't currently own. Also I want to organize a couple of outfits for the boy, because clothes make the man as they say. :)

Quick sexual/lifestyle frustration stream of consciousness post...

I adore my boy and everything he is and everything we have. Our dynamic is very much about support and service and thriving without struggle.

But sometimes… okay, lots of the time… I crave owning someone who has a desire to be pushed, phyiscally. Someone for whom physicality is a huge part of D/s. Someone who would enjoy things like hard bondage, long term bondage, uncomfortable bondage… things like not being allowed on furniture and sleeping full time in a cage (and someone for whom that was a real option, because as much as the boy wouldn’t mind that, it would conflict with his health and his job)… someone who would enjoy being pushed, enjoy the struggle, enjoy battling their inner selves out on the physical plane.

One day, I’m sure I’ll find them…

Hooked Up #6

Hooked Up was yesterday. My friends and I repeated our performance from last time, with big energy work and big awesomeness. I'll post pictures from it when I have them, because I am absolutely certain there will be some great ones.

It was a lovely few hours, I always feel amazing at hook events. They're like church for me. A lot of people coming together and FEELING things together, pushing themselves, caring for each other, loving... our little corner was full of people hugging, not just hello and goodbye but hugs because we wanted to, because we were a part of something and wanted to feel it physically, feel each other's touch and skin to ground us and remind us why we were there.

It was so much. It was so wonderful.

I was going to write more about it but I've just started remembering it all and it's savouring away in my mind. Perhaps I'll come back and write more about it some other time, when it's a little further away and easier to use actual words to think about the experience.

Stuff and Things

There's a lot of heavy, heavy things going on with my blood family at the moment and I'm a bit (lol understatement) stressed out.

I don't really know why I'm writing this here, I suppose it's a heads up in case my updating continues to be a bit odd over the coming weeks.

I'm hoping to combat my stress with more play and fun than usual though so hopefully I'll have a lot to write about, even if it won't be very deep. :)