Tuesday, December 8, 2009


On December 6, I officially collared my boy.

We've been D/s for a long time, so not much has changed... but the little that has means a lot to me, and will make me feel more secure and comfortable in our relationship.

We had a very casual ceremony at one of the local kink events, with many of our friends to witness it. It was a little awkward at first, I told the story of how we met and why we decided to change from vanilla boyfriends to Daddy and boy, and that we didn't plan the ceremony at all.

Oh, we spent hours talking and planning and thinking out the ceremony... but in the end, we decided that we have planned little else in our relationship, perhaps it would be best if we just improvised our ceremony as well.

We exchanged some words, talked about what this meant for us, and then I collared him. Honestly it was a little awkward and might have been better if we had planned it, but several of our friends were quite teary-eyed afterwards so it couldn't have been as bad as I had thought :)

My boy and I hugged and our friends applauded. Then my "best man" (a dear friend of mine whose job it was to hold the collar until I needed it and make sure I couldn't run away, as I am a bit of a commitment-phobe) bought me drink, and then we all stayed to play and have a good night out.

I played with the boy a couple of times, nothing too different or anything - I am saving rituals for a later point, which I am sure I will write about then - however he did start crying as I was flogging him, and he took a little while to recover from it. He's not very good at accessing his own emotions but I suspect he touched briefly up against a level of subspace that he is not familiar with.

It was good crying, though, and the fact that he did not safeword and it was my decision to stop and care for him bodes well for our future relationship.

It was a very small affair, and I can't say that I feel that different afterwards, or even that our relationship is any different now, but that is hardly the point. The point is that there is no wiggle room in this relationship any more. We are Daddy and boy, that is who we are, and we never have to stumble over our words when people ask, ever again.

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